Fringe Candy: Box of Boogers

The Pick of the Day!
The Pick of the Day!

“Blog about candy,” the little voice in the back of my head told me ages ago. “You love weird candy! How could this possibly go wrong?”

Last October a good friend presented me with a box of candy she had picked up. Saw it and thought of me. Had to get it for me. Needed to see a post about it.

It’s amazing the effect packaging and presentation will have on a person.

Box of Boogers is made by Flix Candy just north of Chicago (though the candy itself is made in China). It’s part of their seasonal Halloween line, because late October is when boogers ripen and are picked and packed…

Sorry. Couldn’t help myself there.

Flix Candy is a special kind of fringe candy maker. One that I haven’t really touched on before. Most of the candies I review here are niche or fringe because they’re out of the mainstream, but enduring, candies that have been around for generations and have history. And I’ve also looked at things like artisan candies, particularly chocolate because that’s a huge and varied market filled by tons of small confectioners. This is neither, but it is undeniably fringe.

Flix Candy doesn’t have a lot of history. They started in the 1990’s and don’t try to make any claims about deliciousness. No, their own website proudly touts them as an “innovative and reliable source of quality candy products.” I know. Not much of a hook. But they aren’t selling the sizzle. They’re selling something else.

They make candy for licensed properties, like the broad spectrum of Disney-owned IP (from princesses to Spider-Man), or Klondike, or Angry Birds. They also make seasonal candies for those of you who want Monsters U Halloween candy or candy Spider-Man Easter eggs. You get the picture.

Fringe, but not exactly artisan, not exactly mom and pop.

And then there’s the Box of Boogers. They have a monster in a chef’s hat on the box because hey, Halloween. These are described as “Tangy gummy boogies that look & feel real!” I was understandably reluctant to open these up and dig in. Presentation counts for a lot. The market for these is most likely 12 year old boys. And I’m more than 3 decades removed from finding these appealing.

Upon opening the box, I find that these look boogers in the same way Mickey looks like a mouse. They’re cartoonish malformed blobs in shades of green and yellow. They have a slight powder coat, so they don’t have the high gloss of a good gummy bear. They’re more akin to a classic cinnamon bear by texture, but chew like a gummy. Texture and mouth feel is perfectly inoffensive. As for taste, these are nothing to write home about. They’re no more tangy than your average gummy. Bit of fruit flavor, but I couldn’t tell you what kind of fruit. Let’s just call it “Froot” flavor. The back of the box says “Watermelon/Green Apple/Lemon Lime”(actually, they call them “Snottermelon/Sour Green Boogy/Lemon Loogy) but I call bullshit. Maybe if I took time to savor each one…yeah. That wasn’t going to happen.

I’ll be honest. My expectations were low. When it comes to gummies, I’m a bit of a traditionalist unless you’re doing something kind of extreme like Sour Patch Kids. And I found that by putting these just out of sight so I didn’t really LOOK at them over much as I was eating, these were just…meh.

As a novelty, I can see the appeal if you’re a pre-teen boy looking to get a reaction from an adult. But if you’re an adult who likes candy rather than just a superficial sugar high and interesting presentation, look elsewhere. Glad I got to try them if for no other reason than they make me crave a good pack of cinnamon bears.

 

 

 

 

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